Now that I’m unemployed I think I’ll find my 15 min. by starring in celebrity sextapes. I just need someone to volunteer a celebrity. Ideas?

OK.. Phelps last race tiem… 10 bucks says he sparks a blunt as he climbs out of the pool

Steph had to have our cat Otto put to sleep today, after 18 years. We’ll always love & miss him. She’s very upset. Please wish her well.

I think I may have my outfit for this years Great Race.

Heh… awesome….. you know, given the theme of the real book, I am really surprised it’s doing as well with Middle America as it is. I’m going to have to read it one of these days.

Hahahahaha…. this is the sign outside the bar my brother and sister-in-law work at.

Ok, it’s midnight… which means, “It’s my birthday, I’ll die if I want to, die if I want to, die if I want to… you would die too, if it happened to you… woah woah woah woah….” Ummm… or something like that… Anyway, Enjoy my wall, bitches…

Ok…I almost wish I was a girl and white and liked tanlines… none of which is true…. but still if you’re gonna be a hot geek….

Dear @iTunesMusic , can you please buy @uvvu just to shut it down? I have yet to get a single digital download to work.

ugh, Peter Jackson says the Hobbit is gonna be 3 films instead of the previously planned 2. You know what, Jackson? Fuck you.