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26 comments for “Telemarketer Theater: Sunturied Sever

  1. avatar
    May 8, 2014 at 8:43 pm

    Best episode yet!

  2. avatar
    May 8, 2014 at 8:45 pm

    my brother (also named chris) when we would get calls like this way back in the day, would switch to a little kid voice and become a little boy named jonny who couldn’t open the peanut butter. he did it so well and would have them on the phone for more than a half hour at a time. we used to record them, good times

  3. avatar
    May 8, 2014 at 8:48 pm

    I have got to keep some porn queued up or something to play really loud so I can pretend I’m having crazy sex on one of the calls.

  4. avatar
    May 8, 2014 at 8:53 pm

    You should make up a list of fake passwords and make them try them all.

  5. avatar
    May 8, 2014 at 8:54 pm

    ooh!!! I like that one!!!

  6. avatar
    May 8, 2014 at 9:05 pm

    My mom used to ring a large hand bell into the phone…:)

  7. avatar
    May 8, 2014 at 9:13 pm

    Brilliant

  8. avatar
    May 8, 2014 at 10:27 pm

    I got one yesterday, too. He tried to tell me that Charlie’s computer had been sending him errors over the last few days. I explained that the computer had been turned off the last few days and expressed feigned concern that a computer that was turned off was sending an error. The poor guy tried very hard to ignore that slight dilemma.

  9. avatar
    May 8, 2014 at 11:20 pm

    Sigh, all I ever get are guys trying to sell me carpet cleaning 🙁

  10. avatar
    May 9, 2014 at 12:25 am

    hilarious!

  11. avatar
    May 9, 2014 at 1:34 am

    Frank called me too. But I just told him to get stuffed.

  12. avatar
    May 9, 2014 at 2:16 am

    I can see my mother-in-law falling for this. It’s sad.

  13. avatar
    May 9, 2014 at 2:31 am

    there’s always the “sure, can you wait a second while i go sit down at my computer.” then put the phone down and go do something else.

  14. avatar
    May 9, 2014 at 2:33 am

    Erin: Was his name Frank too?

  15. avatar
    May 9, 2014 at 2:38 am

    That’s what he said. But somehow I doubt it was his given name.

  16. avatar
    May 9, 2014 at 2:39 am

    same here… did he use the same script and speak really slow?

  17. avatar
    May 9, 2014 at 2:39 am

    Dang, I’m going to have to start answering those calls. You’re having WAY too much fun. Oh, I forgot, you are ‘Lonzo’s grandson.

  18. avatar
    May 9, 2014 at 2:40 am

    I don’t know, he didn’t get as far as the Suntory server.

  19. avatar
    May 9, 2014 at 3:31 am

    I got one a few years ago who claimed his name was Mitt. I guess he thought that was a common American name.

  20. avatar
    May 9, 2014 at 4:58 am

    Falling off the couch laughing. Thank you for taking the time to transcribe and post this!

  21. avatar
    May 9, 2014 at 10:00 am

    Priceless!!

  22. avatar
    May 9, 2014 at 12:03 pm

    Funniest shit ever lol

  23. avatar
    May 9, 2014 at 2:04 pm

    Laughing out loud, causing Fiona to ask what was so funny. Oh, darling, you’ll understand when you’re older…

  24. avatar
    May 9, 2014 at 6:24 pm

    “Do you want to be an identity thief or not, Frank?” ahahah omg.

  25. avatar
    May 9, 2014 at 6:34 pm

    Maybe I should open a school for identity thieves!!!

  26. avatar
    May 9, 2014 at 6:43 pm

    Schooled! 🙂 Nice one. 🙂

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