Trick or treat. When I was a kid, I thought whoever came up with it was a genius. Once a year you get to dress up and carry a pillow case around and hit up every house in a five mile radius for free candy. Everything you’d ever want out of a holiday as a kid.
What the fuck happened?
You know how many kids we got this year. None! Not a one! Zero point Zero!
Kids suck these days.
Oh well. At least there’s lots of leftover candy for me.