So very very tired…
I had aspirations of writing a blog entry tonight. I had aspirations of working on some shots of Sarah. I had a lot of good intentions.
It just didn’t happen.
Worked a long day, and it was bitterly cold outside. So things were bad to start with.
Then when I got home, I got a call from Steph, she had gotten a flat tire and needed help with it. So I drove out to meet her and change her tire, only to discover that her tire iron was broken. So then we had to wait forever for AAA, and by the time I finally got home, all motivation was just sapped from me. It was all I could do to actually get this shot done after 11.
I want to become one of those artists you’re always hearing about that actually make a living. I’m actually pretty confident in my ability and style as a photographer. Even saying that makes me feel pompous. I usually am really critical of myself and basically see y own faults a lot, but I’ve also seen a lot of the garbage porn that makes money on the internet sometimes, and I swear I’m at the very least in the top 50% there. But I actually don’t want to be a "pornographer." I obviously like shooting glamour and erotica and such, but I have my own ideas of what photography should be and where I want to go as an artist, and dammit, people should pay me for it!
I actually came up with an awesome idea for a shoot this weekend. I’m really excited about it. It would be great for a magazine there. I asked four of my favorite models if they’d be interested and they would. It’s going to be awesome. The only thing is, to make it truly awesome I’d want to spend some money on it. There’s wardrobe and props I want to get. There’ hair dressers and makeup artists I’d like to buy. There’s paying the girls. If I did it right, this could be fan-fucking-tastic. But you know, doing it right would cost money too. And I sadly don’t really have any of that. I hate life.
Oh, and I decided to take this shot to have my own picture for my "Light and Shadow" challenge I issued on this week’s 365 Days Podcast(iTunes). And if you haven’t been watching the podcast, please, by all means check this one out. It’s our special Valentine’s day episode, featuring interviews with 3 different couples who met through the project. I think it turned out great.